Witch Bottle Y’all Stupid Unity Project – Or Is It? Psychology today article on the vampire subculture SURVEY RESULT: Determining the Needs of the Vampire Community DreamWalking How To TVN(thevampirenetwork) Interview State of the VC 2016 Year End Storing energy in objects Equivalent Exchange Healing When Criminals Lurk Among Us Dissolving newager kin untruths: Demonkin No Dick Sucking! July Recap GVC Diversity–are we doing it right? Through a Donor’s Eyes Earth Exercises Accepting Submissions June Recap Survey: Determining The Needs of the Vampire Community An Intro Into Chaos Magick Primal Auto Feeding The Path of The Elementalist ritual How To Find Your Element May Recap Relationships and Donors Feather Exercise Salt Baths and Removing Links Controlling your phantom shifts How to Make Herbal Infused Oils Figuring out what you are State of the Otherkin/Therian Communities April Recap Presentation! Vampires are not the only ones who feed. Coming Out To Others Recognizing Others Lucid Dreaming Learning Mirrors and Past Life Regression Gummies! and Other Blood Candy Learning to Sense Energy Around You Eros Vampire Survey Drama used to Psifeed? Elemental Feeding The Sorcerer’s Shadow: Volume One So Demonkin? Real Benefits of Being Drained Reflections The New Site! The Beast: from Energy-feeders’ Perspective Amy Mah – The GVC’s Own Donald Trump How does the Herd Mentality Affect the Vampire Culture? Vampirism February Roundup and Recap Interview With Sangorath Excelsi Into The Shadows Newsletter Idea Step-by-Step Psi-Feeding Coyote Medicine Insight Delight: Feeding on Epiphany Meontological Musings II: The Truth is in Here Meontological Musings: Finding Satisfaction in Nothing Otherkin Community Warning! 2-1-16 January 2016 on Shadow Sage Spirit Servitors Gray Magic Blood bonds Starting Your Own House or Local Community To Forum or Not To Forum?  8 Tips For New Donors Altars Packs- The Breakdown Toxic! Shielding With a Remote Energy Source How To Find A Donor Vampirism in Mary’s Words Ferment Your Own Emotional Energy Healing via Shamanic Discourse A New Year’s Message Vampiric Lexicon Vampire Community Newbie Guide An Interview With Kinesia: Looking Into The Sang Medical Research Copied from something I posted in VCN… How to load words Cyber-Feeding 101 Hybrid Healing Energy The Beast Part 2 Core Feeding Houses and You Open Call Where did the C in VC go? Elders,Kings, Titles and You Calling What New Donors Need to Know Privacy and You Energy Healing Basics Psi Feeding and Energy Vibrations The Beast Inside

Meontological Musings II: The Truth is in Here

 

As described in an earlier post (Meontological Musings: Finding Satisfaction in Nothing), my personal experiences as a psi-vampire involve regular excursions through the psyches of donors. Immersing myself in my donors’ deliciously diverse ways of seeing the world allows me to function at my peak without suffering from the migraines, intense sensitivity to light and sound, fatigue, and malaise I associate with an unsatisfied need for donor energy. At the same time, such descents into others’ minds, when probing or lengthy enough to satisfy my need fully, sometimes present a threat to my sense of self. Occasionally I’ll disconnect from a donor at the close of an exchange and feel nourished yet floating in a sort of existential limbo, unsure of where exactly my donor ends and I begin.

Struggling to resolve this amorphous sense of self led me to all sorts of new-age self-help books and websites about discovering my true, inner self and grounding myself in my own personal truth. While those systems may work for some, they did nothing but frustrate me; their descriptions of a constant connection to a source of vital energy flowing freely to anyone truly open to it clearly weren’t written with a vampiric audience in mind. What did ultimately help me feed without feeling like I might forever lose myself in the process was a major change in perspective informed by my understanding of meontology.

As a quick review, meontology is the study of not-being, and my interpretation of a meontological void, or metavoid, is one that is not only defined by an infinite absence of substance, but also a complete lack of governing rules. As a result, such a metavoid wouldn’t be subject to the laws of conservation, and everything in every combination would simultaneously spring into existence. So let’s assume that model has some merit and there exist an infinite number of distinct universes. Why this one? Why does this universe experience gravity and electromagnetism and babies screaming on airplanes? It turns out the answer to those questions are self-evident given the right outlook.

Given such a boundless array of ontological realities arising from the single metavoid, the ontological laws making up the means of observation available to any observer would determine which particular combination of things an observer perceives. This concept is known as the anthropic principle and, put simply, means that what an individual perceives must be compatible with that individual’s existence. That I live on a planet capable of supporting life like mine isn’t that surprising no matter how rare such planets might be since, if there weren’t such a planet to support lifeforms like myself, I wouldn’t be around to notice or wonder about the nature of the cosmos.

Pretty much any similar question about why things are precisely the way they are can be answered by the anthropic principle. If you didn’t experience an exact series of phenomena, themselves dependent upon countless other forces and events, then you wouldn’t be asking that exact question. Remember, if we’re embracing the concept of the metavoid, every combination of forces must exist so there has to be an infinite number of universes in which you ask any given question and, by extension, an infinite number of universes that allow for and inspire those questions.

I would extend the anthropic principle to include also our experience of memory. Whatever must have occurred in order for our present circumstances to be what they are is determinable by our present state since this state includes whatever rules of causality apply to our particular offshoot of the metavoid. When we remember something, the accessing of that memory occurs in the present as a condition of our current state, the corresponding sensations and perceptions all contained in the instant of memory without necessitating any persistent consciousness through time. In terms of the anthropic principle, the perception of history may be explained wholly in terms of the present as precise past events are necessary to validate the circumstances that presently allow for our observations. In this view, those considerations of cause, those events necessitated in the past by our present, are our memories.

This is not to say that our experiences of time have not earned their title as another dimension alongside those of space or that there is no possibility of the presence of a divine hand; on the contrary, time as a dimension is precisely as valid as the dimensions of space, as our ability to confirm the existence and nature of each of these dimensions equally and inescapably depends upon our experience. It is far from inconceivable, even, that there should be those who perceive more than one dimension of time, interacting directly with the ordered possibilities of potential configurations of interactive patterns in space. Such a being could be considered magical or divine but, ultimately, there are occasions when we all, to some degree, see time this way, moments when we imagine the infinite potential of the future and organize our options according to how realistic, or near, they seem.

Conceivably, in any given instant, the whole of the universe throughout space and time as it pertains to you can be understood entirely in terms of your immediate experience. This idea probably isn’t going to help you travel from one multiversal reality to another or instantaneously transport yourself across even a single universe, but it has helped me overcome the feelings of disorientation I associate with deep feeding. After feeding, some of my perceptions may be temporarily impacted by a donor, but in those moments that I experience confusion, I am someone whose past experiences led to present confusion; I am someone whose personal perspective has been affected by someone else’s; I am a psychic vampire who recently fed, etc. Accepting everything that I experience in those times of confusion as clues to who I am in those moments and, by extension, what world I presently occupy allows me to walk away from feeding sessions not in a daze of existential panic, but with a sense of adventure.

Hesperus

Hesperus

Hesperus is a psi-vampire who has been participating in the vampire community for over a decade as a writer, a member of the VVC, founder of CLAVIS, and recently, an Initiate of House of Dreaming. Writing on topics ranging from psi feeding methods to personal philosophy framed by individual experiences as a vampire, Hesperus strives to present a sincere and balanced perspective.
Hesperus

Latest posts by Hesperus (see all)

© 2016 The Shadow Sage